May Days
Why this time of year makes me stop and look around
Listening to the rain fall in Cooperstown on Saturday morning had me thinking about the passage of time. We’re approaching mid-May, yet it seems like just yesterday that 2026 began. We’re on a family weekend that’s supposed to be filled with golf, but the rain is impacting some of that, so instead we’re enjoying a quieter start to the day. Ethan and Leah are still asleep, my parents are doing their own thing, and Brian and I are each on our laptops, contemplating going down to the gym to get some movement in. I love these unexpected moments of pause when we aren’t always having to move on to the next thing. They give me a chance to think about it all instead of blindly going through the motions.
May, by default, always seems to be a time of reflection for me. Ethan’s finished another year of college. And that in itself makes me think about how fast time flies. This summer also looks a little different as he will be spending a chunk of it interning in Boston. I am so proud of this step he’s taking, but also finding myself a little sad as I try to come to terms with this new stage — where he is really carving out his own place in the world and setting the stage for his own future. It’s everything you hope for as a parent, but that doesn’t mean it’s not still a little sad.
The flip side of that sadness, though, is that this new stage also brings about some of the happiest times — life with a grown child is a more relaxed stage of parenting, at least right now. And while I will always live with a little more worry than most, I find my guard lowering as I see the human Ethan has become, and while he needs guidance (like we all do), it is not the urgent worry or stress that accompanied some other stages of parenting.
And it’s just so fun to share parts of our lives with him that we didn’t before. Later this month, Ethan and Leah are joining us in Disney with the Mahoneys. And there will be shenanigans and laughter and drinks and fun, and I love that those worlds are now merged. Our dearest friends and our kids all together.
In these moments of pause, things fall into focus, and the universe has a way of reminding you of your goals. I’m still excited (at the risk of being annoying) about my Tiny Love Story in the New York Times (online and print), and I can’t wait to see my piece come out tomorrow (5/12) in Huff Post.
In other May news — our deadline for the JHFH SSHS Scholarship is quickly approaching. Please share this with any Saratoga High School students who qualify and have them reach out to me! The more applicants, the better!
Each scholarship is $500. Please submit a typed 250–500-word essay explaining your community service and outreach experience and how you fit our selection criteria, and a resume. Please submit to heather@jakeshelpfromheaven.org.
I love reading about other people in the same stage of life I am in, and I am in the middle of enjoying Wreck by Catherine Newman. Many I talked to didn’t think it was as strong a book as Sandwich, but something about reading this now makes me like it even better. Wreck has me inside the mind of someone like me and is just hitting right now. Check it out if you haven’t.
And in my last piece of reflection, last week’s episode of A Place of Yes was a solo one. They can be difficult to record but also cathartic, and even if no one listens in, it makes me feel like I am working through what so many others also face, and maybe lets others know that we’re all connected in our grief and don’t have to go it alone.
Until next time,
XO
Heather